Yep, it's a girl :0)

So we found out the gender of our little bundle of joy and we are having a GIRL!!!  After the hubby's oldest brother had two boys and then we had our boy, we were certain that the Weber gene was targeted for male chromosome. We were very excited to find out that a little girl would be joining us. (So excited, I don't even care about the traffic ticket I got on my way to the doctors office! :0)  )



Isn't she sweet??

Before we knew the gender, I must admit that I had mixed feelings about having a girl. Don't get me wrong; I am very happy and I can't wait to meet our little princess, but hear me out. It will be great having a little girl. All the fun toys and the cute clothes. Fun girly activities I haven't been able to do with my son. I've already begun decorating her room in my head and on Pinterest. But then she'll turn 13 and become someone else entirely. There aren't many things worse than a teenage girl. I was one once, so I kinda know. The attitude and the "I hate you"s and the "you ruined my life"s are inevitable. And I am not excited about that. I know she'll grow out of it and I'll do my best to show her love anyway and hopefully raise her as a kind, loving, confident person, but I know there are struggles ahead of me.

 

Also, being a teenage girl these days seems to be a tough thing to do. The pressures they face are different than what boys face. It seems like as soon as they leave the house, they are bombarded with images and words and people telling them they aren't good enough and they need to do this or that and look a certain way. As her mother, I need to undo all that negativity. I need to make sure she knows she is good enough no matter what. It's a lot work and needs to be done daily. This is something I need to prepare myself for, especially since I'm still convincing myself of those same things.

 

Aside from my own, I have a lot of really good parenting role models in my life that I can look to, so I'm very thankful for that. I think that is important. We shouldn't try to do this alone. It takes a village to help each other out.

 

The ultrasound itself was so great. We got to see so much and the doctor gave us a lot of really cool images of our daughter. We even got some video too, so that was really special because we didn't get to that with our son.

 

He did say that my placenta was low, though, which isn't a great thing. He said he could move on its own (and that is what we are praying for. about 90-95% move themselves), but we do need to keep an eye on it and I need to go back in at 34 weeks to check it's placement again. If it hasn't moved or moved to block the cervix, a C section may be needed. So we are definitely praying and praying hard.

 

But for now, let the shopping begin! :0)

 

A little video of our little princess

 

Baby paranoia....

They say you are more relaxed with your second pregnancy because of the whole "been there, done that" thing. I would like to say that, for me at least, this is so far from the truth! For some reason I am quite paranoid about this pregnancy.

At least when I had the "morning" sickness, it was a sign to me that I was in fact preggo. I have been over that for quite some time now, but I'm still at the stage where the baby is too small to feel moving around. I have to say, it really freaks me out. Has anyone felt like this? I mean, I know I'm pregnant. My waist line is a dead giveaway to that! But without the consistent and definite kicks, it's hard for my head to get it.

They say that 2nd timers can feel the baby moving sooner because they know what they are feeling this time. My problem is I honestly don't remember what the initial movements felt like or when I started feeling them. Every once in a while I think I feel the baby moving around in there, but then I don't really know, do I? I start to think I'm making myself believe it. I remember when I was farther along in my pregnancy and the baby was kicking and moving like crazy and there was no doubt it was a human being inside my belly fighting my insides for space (and winning. Especially against my ribs and lungs...). 

I have an ultrasound on Tuesday. The big one. The one where they use the ultra super hi-tech machine and look at all the bones and organs and such. The one where we can find out if we are having another little boy or breaking the Weber trend and finally adding a girl to the mix. I'll just about be at the half-way point and I can't wait to see my little baby again on that monitor. In the meantime, I'll try to concentrate and focus the flutters he or she is making in this temporary little home.

We finally announced! And I'm super sick...

 
 
Well, we finally told our families on Thanksgiving. That was the hardest part, I think, keeping it a secret from my mom and dad. Then we put a picture of the ultra sound on our Christmas card as our big announcement and told all our friends on Facebook (because we all know nothing is official until it is posted on Facebook, right?)

We did all this announcing at the beginning of December. We've since had another ultrasound and the doctor has changed our due date to June 24 because I was measuring bigger. So that means it is highly likely that I will be spending my birthday (June 26) in labor. I'm not big on sharing my birthday (except for with Alison because she was born before me and she's pretty awesome), but I think if I have to share it with my baby, it will be worth it. What a great birthday present! (That doesn't mean you don't have to get me something, dear hubby!)

Just before Christmas, JJ started coughing a lot. Turns out he has bronchitis. Then right after Christmas, I got a cold. A really bad one. I was completely out of commission on Thursday and yesterday and even now I'm writing this in my jammies laying on the couch, where I've been since yesterday. On the plus side I'm writing from super cool purple laptop I got for Christmas!!

Being sick when you are pregnant is the worst because you can't really do anything about it. There are very few medications you can take and I'm not a big eater when I'm sick so I feel like I'm not eating enough for my baby. I'm trying and I'm taking my prenatals, but it is something I do worry about. I slept on the couch all night because 1) I didn't want to get my husband sick and 2) if I had a rough night, I didn't want to keep him up tossing and turning. I will say I feel much better this morning though. I'm still pretty congested and my throat is sore, but I don't feel like I'm dying anymore which is a really good thing.  I'm being very cautious with this pregnancy and trying to follow all the rules as strictly as possible. Last night I did give in and take a Benedryl because it is on my doctor's list of approved medications for congestion. I may or may not take another one tonight, we'll see, but I'm probably going to get some nasal spray because that is also on the list and I've had success with that before (not pregnant).

My next doctor's appointment isn't until December 7 but hopefully it will come soon and I can get some peace of mind that my baby is still OK. I can't help but be paranoid.

Embracing the Nausea

I wish I had remembered to keep track of everything when I was preggo with JJ. Its hitting me, all the things I don't really remember. Like the nausea. I remember having it. I just don't remember exactly when or the pattern or how bad it ever got. I don't think it ever was terrible. I didn't throw up too much, just some mornings.  I remember being happy when it was over.

 

Everything I've read says most women don't start really feeling pregnancy symptoms until around the 6th week and that sounds about right, but I gotta say I've already been feeling the nausea. It isn't terrible, but I've definitely stocked up on my supplies from my first pregnancy: Ginger Ale (.88 each when you buy 4 at Ralphs, so I scored on that one), Lemon drops (I've suggested this to other pregnant friends and it never seems to work for them, but it did for me, so there you have it), peppermint candies (my previous OB/GYN suggested this me. It helps with the excess saliva as well as works as a calming force on the stomach acid) and Tums (these were my lifesavers before. A little bit during the beginning of the pregnancy but a lot in the final months).

 

This time it is different, though. When I was pregnant for those few short weeks in July, I didn't feel sick at all. Not once. This time, the nausea is reminder that I am carrying a life inside me. It reminds me that I was blessed with this child. I am fully embracing the nausea this time around. It is a sign that I am pregnant and I count it a blessing.

 

This time is also different in that I am showing already. That was another sign before I took the test. It is true that you show earlier in your second pregnancy (since your uterus and stomach muscles are already stretched out, once the pregnancy hormones kick in, your uterus/stomach automatically start to take on their round shape. It is like blowing up a balloon that's already been blown up before) and I am no exception. I can still wear regular shirts, but I've already taken to wearing maternity pants for comfort. If this keeps up, it is going to make it pretty hard to keep this pregnancy under wraps until December. Maybe I should invest in some large briefcases to carry around with me. Or would it be too weird to carry a laundry basket to work? 

Best Anniversary Present ever

I don't like to brag, but I like to think I gave my husband the best anniversary present ever (actually, it was for both of us).

 

As you know, we've been trying for a few months now to get pregnant. We had one unsuccessful pregnancy in July and since then its just been a waiting game.

 

I've been tracking my days religiously, calculating time days. I had a system down pat. We had a schedule and we were going to keep it no matter what. I've never been so in-tuned with my body.

 

I was also still pretty cautious. I'm not a fan of disappointment (who is?) and that single line on a preggo test is about as disappointing as they come. I'm also not a fan of waiting, but I was resolved to not take a single test until after I was supposed to get my period. No matter how much I wanted to know, it wasn't going to happen. I was going to wait so there was no question.

 

For a few days starting, I don't know, October 16 or 17, I was feeling very blah. I was tired a lot. Falling asleep when I got home from work and then falling asleep for the night around 8:30. I have a lot of half-watched shows on my dvr right now. It is not totally unusual for me to be tired since I work such crazy hours (5am to 1:30pm), but to take a nap and go to bed early is a bit excessive. I was also hungry all the time and just generally not feeling well. I knew it in my gut that I was going to get a positive test.

 

The timing was great, actually, because it was Thursday night and the next day was my 4th wedding anniversary. My husband was out watching the Thursday night football game. I knew it was early (I wasn't due to start my period until Monday) but I thought if it came out negative I'd just go back to the original plan and try again on Monday. If it was positive then Great! It turned out to be positive. And not just a faint is-it-there-or-not second line, but it was an instant dark no-doubt-about-it second line. Honestly, I was surprised. I wasn't really expecting a positive, but I was elated! I was also kinda glad my husband was not at home because I don't know if I would have been able to keep it a secret from him until the next day.

 

Friday morning I took another test (the box came with two: one regular and one digital). I took the digital test Friday morning and of course it was still a "+Yes" and I was just as elated. I put both tests in a little envelope I made and attached a card for my husband telling him Happy Anniversary. Inside I wrote a note and said, "I can't wait to make the three of us four."

 

He called me at work and was so thrilled.

 

We are feeling so blessed right now!! But it is going to be hard to keep it a secret until after 12 weeks... That seems so far away!

Pregnancy memories

One of the things I really I'd done when I was pregnant with JJ was to keep some sort of log or journal of my pregnancy memories (especially since I suddenly can't remember anything about being pregnant the first time!) So when I found out I was preggo this time, I started to journal this pregnancy. I hadn't announced anything yet, so I saved up my posts.  As I should have expected, I completely forgot to post the saved blogs!! So I'm posting them now. I really think I'm going to enjoy having these pregnancy memories.

Another important political discussion...

I would like to preface this by saying that I'm going to try not to make this an "angry rant" because it is a subject that is very important to me and it is a hot button issue all over the country right now.

 

Recently two politicians (a congressman and a senate candidate) have come under extreme fire/scrutiny for commenting on their believes on pregnancies that result from rapes. The most recent comment was that if a rape results in a pregnancy, it was God's Will.

 

This politician immediately came under fire. People (including someone I know) called him the "worst person in the world." Why? Because he believes life begins at conception and values human life? Gee, what a terrible person, especially compared to the murders and drug lords and genocidal leaders and the Taliban, for crying out loud. He is being practically nailed to the wall for what he said. Guess what? He didn't say that the rape itself was God's Will. I can't believe anybody would actually think that he believes that. He was saying that if after all that goes on in such a terrible situation as rape, if a baby is conceived, it is just as much a miracle than if a man and woman were actively trying to have a baby. Like Paul Ryan said, a life is a life regardless of the circumstances of how it came to be. 

 

When I lost my baby back in July, it was awful. People rallied around me saying how sorry they were, including many who don't believe what I do. If people think that at 6 weeks I only lost a group of cells, not a baby, why would they be sorry for me? Not a life, not a big deal, right? Why is it that if a woman miscarries it is a truly sad thing, but if she aborts, its exercising her woman's right? So a note to all: I too believe that begins at conception, so I guess that makes me a terrible person as well...

 

The other politician started a scandal when he said that it is unlikely that a rape would result in pregnancy. I don't know if that's true --I'm not a doctor-- but this was also not a new statement to me. I had heard many times in my life that the conditions of a forcible rape (the adrenaline, the stress, the fear) are not ideal conditions for conception. Again I don't know if that's true because my medical training is non-existent, but it sort of makes sense to me. Along with all that, the timing would have to spot on, you know what I mean?

 

Let me expand on that. As any woman who has gone through Trying To Conceive can attest, myself included, the conditions for pregnancy are very specific and particular. The parameters that must be met are limited. The average woman of prime child-bearing years has one cycle every month. In that month, there are only 1-2 days when she actually ovulates. Depending on age and health, most women only have about a 20% chance of getting pregnant each month. The older you get, the lower your chances are. Women trying to get pregnant count and calculate until they can't stand it anymore. It takes the average couple 6 months to conceive.

 

Here's some more biology for you: Tens of Millions of sperm enter the female body. Most of those will die or get "lost" along the way (insert cheesy man vs. directions joke here). Then the sperm have to choose between two fallopian tubes and hope they get the right one. Then once the sperm reaches the egg (FYI: there are only about 100 left at this point, out of the initial tens of millions), they have to find a weak spot in the egg to burrow into. The odds aren't great. This video is a bit dramatic in the narration, but it explains it well.

 

So, pushing the emotional/hormonal stuff going on in your body during a rape aside, the rape itself would have to occur within a day or two of ovulation and the sperm would have had to find its way to the egg and penetrate the egg itself in order to result in pregnancy. I'm not saying it wouldn't happen, but I am saying the chances are small so I really don't think that should be the definitive argument for the legality of abortion. No website will offer hard statistics because they are so hard to prove, but I really don't think the majority of abortions are because of rape or incest. I just don't.

 

I know this isn't a popular opinion, but it's mine and I own it. I am tired of people, especially other women, making women feel like they are casting aside their womanly duties by not supporting abortion. I will never support abortion, to be honest with you. I never feel like it is OK to kill a child, in or out of the womb. In fact, I told my husband if it ever came to that, choosing between me or the baby, to always choose the baby. Rape is a terrible and tragic thing that should never happen, but it isn't the baby's fault.

 

People got upset when certain states passed a law that required an ultrasound before an abortion. Were they perhaps upset because they would see a living being? They don't want to know that a heart is beating and the organs are forming and the baby has a brain and a central nervous system and cardiovascular system and fingers and toes and CAN HEAR YOU.

 

OK, I think that is all for now. I'm sure I can say more. I could talk about this all day. I'm not trying to change minds (though if I helped, that would be great), but I am trying to make sure that my opinion and those like mine are just as respected as people who disagree. People need to stop putting others down for what they believe just because it is different. It is a threat to the freedom of speech and that is a dangerous territory to be getting ourselves into.